I don't stay with my parents?

some would say you don't rely on your parents forever, you grow up, move out, start your own life or a family of your own.  really?  i've never heard of this, it must be a weird concept that unhealthy people live out.   

my picture of childhood; you listen and do as your told, nothing more or nothing less.  

my picture of adolescence; you remember where you came from and how much we've done for you.

my picture of young adulthood; you're going to a college that's only an hour away right?

my picture of mature adulthood; how dare you leave us for your husband, we've raised you and sacrificed for you.

i've been married for almost 9 years now.  i didn't understand the guilt and shame that has been held over my head until just last fall.  i felt i did something wrong for leaving my mom and dad (mother especially).  i tried to fix it by calling daily, making frequent visits and more dramatically dying to my desires and needs.  if you've ever been here you understand that trying to balance a relationship with dependant/co-dependant parents and your spouse is absolutely draining.  you can manage for a while until you look at your life and feel so angry and lost almost like you are no longer a person.  well that's just what happens, you are no longer a person because you are their person.   

well today i am making a choice.  I  am choosing to no longer be their person, i will be my own.